SCIENCE!

The chefs of the Hyper Kitchen are doing a yeoman's job of making this blog the very best of the internet. We have quite a few things simmering away, and the management thought it'd be a good idea to offer a taste of things to come. So, harnessing the power of Science, we have sundered the fourth-dimensional veil and reveal the shadowy specter of Things to Come.

Expect these special features:

-The History of TV Creature Feature Hosts!

-The world's smartest man, and why we're all doomed!

-The full story behind the missing 7,600lb nuclear bomb!

-Stan Ridgway: how David Lynch and Yogi Bear inspired this famous musician!

-Radio doctor John Brinkley and his promise of extended life and vitality through xenotransplantation!

-The man with three ears!

-Maila Nurmi: the life of a Hollywood vampire!

-The imminent technological singularity (or "Robopocalypse Now")!

-How Superman ended World War II!

-The cinematic car-accident that is Blood of Ghastly Horror!

-What is the mystery of...KLEE?!

And so much more! Tell your friends and neighbors!

Be prepared.

Join the Smart Patrol

Remember: bowl for health. Bowl for life.

Money and Success

It's been only twenty-three minutes since the Hyper Kitchen's first post, and already to public reaction has been astounding. Our inboxes have been drowned in over five million letters of thunderous praise and we don't mind telling you that we are currently negotiating the Hyper Kitchen movie rights.

Some of you may be worrying that all this new found fame and glory will result in our total corruption, but we cannot disagree more vehemently. Without you little people, the cultural phenonomenon of the Hyper Kitchen could not be possible and in our gratitude we post this picture of a proud, American astronaut.

We're ready to believe in you!