As I looked around the Reading Room table, I saw only grim faces. Our procrastination had at last become our undoing. It was then that Hector Gush, our staff historian and pastry-maker, pointed out that it was unfair to our fan base to pass off inferior, rushed work in the place of the sumptuous food for thought that you truly deserve. We had only one option.
While it breaks our hearts to do this, we have decided to use hypnotism to make you forget this entire incident. It's an underhanded move, sure, but it buys us time to work and we'll make it up to you. Now: stare deeply into the center of Hypno-Spiral.