Devil Claw

The Codex Gigas is a manuscript dating back to the thirteenth century. Weighing in at 165 pounds and measuring more than 19 inches wide and just over two feet tall, the book is the largest of its kind (its name literally meaning "Giant Book"). The book was originally created in Bohemia, in what is now the Czech Republic, but was captured by the Swedish army in the 1600's and has since been on display in the Swedish Royal Library in Stockholm.

The book contains a Latin version of the Bible, written in ornate, multi-colored ink. Despite its great age, handsome design, and enormous size, the Codex Gigas is widely known for a single illustration that dominates page 577.

According to the lore that surrounds the Codex, the book was written by a Czech monk who was instructed by his superiors to create the massive volume in a single night or face imprisonment. With god having thrown him a curveball with this impossible task, the monk summoned the Devil for assistance. In exchange for his soul, the Devil helped him complete the titanic Codex. In gratitude, the monk included an illustration of the ol' Prince of Darkness. Scientists. however, believe that the Codex was written over a period of twenty-years and there was no satanic involvement. Still, the illustration is a striking one, and especially prominant in a book that is mostly text.

Notice how the eyes seem to follow you?

Would you like to know more?
-Visit the book's official site
-Read about the Codex on National Geographic's site

Dawn of Man or Hero of the Beach?

The origin of humankind has been a point of contention for as long as we've had the capacity for introspection. Throughout history, adherents of wildly contradictory explanations have locked horns and even in today's modern times it remains a touchy subject. In spite of all this, scientific inquiry had shed light on humanity's humble beginnings and there is a general consensus concerning our development and our shared heritage with other primates. It is basically acknowledged that homo sapiens are descended from hominids that (for reasons still under debate) departed from the trees to the tall grasses of the savannah. In evolutionary terms, that really got the ball rolling.

Because we're dealing with events from a unknowably distant period in Earth's history, all we can do is make informed conjecture based upon fossil evidence. Our knowledge of man's development is far from complete, and certain behavioral and physical traits still require explanation. Over the decades, various theories invariably come forward to fill these gaps. Some are carefully considered and firmly based upon observation of available data. Others are decidedly strange. The Aquatic Ape Hypothesis, which holds that modern man evolved from an amphibious hominid, belongs firmly in the latter category.

Here's the skinny: the idea first surfaced in 1930, when a British marine biologist named Alistair Hardy reasoned that man's ancestors were shoved from the trees by our competitive ape cousins and these proto-humans took to the shores to feed upon the shellfish. Eventually they adapted to their watery environment, and the vestiges of these adaptations can still be seen in modern humans. Not yet a credentialed scientist, Hardy was apprehensive about divulging his theory to the world and waited until 1960, in which he detailed his unique hypothesis to a meeting of British Sub-Aqua Club, subsequently publishing his lecture in the pages of New Scientist magazine.

The idea was immediately controversial. However, Hardy's theory did have its proponents, one being BBC television screen-writer Elaine Morgan. Morgan was convinced that the accepted theories about humanity's early days were born out of a male-dominated scientific world and failed to answer crucial questions because they were inherently sexist. In 1967, she read about Hardy's theory in its brief mention in The Naked Ape by Desmond Norris. Morgan was taken with the idea and became the theory's principle advocate.

Morgan asserts that the Aquatic Ape Hypothesis offers explanations for man's upright posture and general lack of hair, among other traits and condemns the paleontologist community for narrow-mindedness and conservatism. Still, the hypothesis hasn't won any major interest in the past forty years among serious scientists, primarily due to the crucial lack of supporting evidence. The skeletal remains of these water-loving ancestors were apparently carried off by the waves, as zero fossils have ever been discovered that corroborate with the theory. Additionally (and this will come as no surprise to anyone) modern aquatic and semi-aquatic mammals are remarkably different from humans in their design. With our long limbs and non-webbed hands, we make comparatively mediocre swimmers. If we ever had an aquatic stage, we'd look more like dolphins....which is a somewhat terrifying thought.

Elaine Morgan continues to write about the Aquatic Ape subject and deliver lectures at UK universities. We can't help but feel somewhat sad about her long, thankless mission. Frankly, her theory just doesn't hold water.

Would you like to know more?

-Watch this video of Elaine Morgan discussing hear theories

-Read this critique of Elaine Morgan's book The Scars of Evolution

-Watch the BBC documentary on the subject, The Aquatic Ape

Commence Re-entry

The commissioner just called.

We've been reactivated.

Stand-by.

Minor Magic

Thanks to pop-culture, nearly everyone has heard of Necromancy or the practice of black magic that deals exclusively with the dead. Those that haven't heard are missing out. Go watch a Conan flick and get educated.

At any rate, in the realm of mythology and folklore, Necromancy was primarily a method of divination, or predicting the future. However, you needn't hike to your local graveyard, shovel in hand, just to catch of a glimpse of That Yet to Be. Here are some alternative methods, taken from An Encylopaedia of Occultism by Lewis Spence (published in 1920).

Aromancy: A method of divination which is effected by the inspection of the shoulders. The ancients judged by this means whether a victim was suitable for sacrifice to the gods.

Capnomancy: The observation of smoke, which consisted of three principal methods, including the practice of breathing the smoke of the sacrificial fire.

Cleromancy: Was practised by throwing dice. Mentioned in Egypt and Rome.

Critomancy: Divination by means of observing cakes. The paste of cakes which are offered in sacrifice, is closely examined, and from the flour which is spread upon them, omens are drawn.

Gyromancy: Was performed by going round continually in a circle, the circumference of which was marked by letters.

Hippomancy: A method of divination practised by the ancient Celts, who kept certain white horses in consecrated groves. If on leaving in the outbreak of hostilities they crossed the threshold with the left forehoof first, the presage was regarded as an evil one, and the war was abandoned.

Kephalomancy: A method of divination which is practised by making signs on the baked head of an ass. It was familiar to the Germans and the Lombards substituted for it the head of a goat.

Onychomancy: Divination by fingernails. It is practised by watching the reflection of the sun in the nails of a boy, and judging the future by the shape of the figures which show themselves on their surface.

Stoichemancy: A method of divination which is practised by opening the works of Homer or Virgil and reading as an oracular statement the first verse which presents itself.

Stolisomancy: Divination from the manner in which a person dresses himself.

Tiromancy: Divination by means of cheese. It is practised in diverse ways the details of which are not known.

But don't take my word for it!

You can read about in a book.

Sadists of the Sky

As Canada slowly burns away, May quietly exits the building. Clearly it's time for another Monster of the Month. Many of our previous entries have been fished out of the murky pool of b-movie cinema, so we thought that it was high time that we enriched the pulsating young minds of our readers by visiting the world of art. We at the Hyper Kitchen are connoisseurs of high culture, and believe us when we say that all truly great art has monsters in it. Case in point: the Torment of Saint Anthony by Michelangelo.

Originally thought to have been painted by Domenico Ghirlandaio (Michelangelo's mentor and fellow Italian), it was eventually determined to be a Michelangelo piece in 2009. Drawing upon medieval Christian folklore, the painting depicts Saint Anthony swept into the air by a horde of shrieking demons. While a few of these devils are of the more generic variety, most are surreal beasts with animal features. Of particular merit is what appears to be a melancholy hybrid of fish, porcupine, and elephant, ready to bash in Saint Anthony's head with a large club.

Adventures in Science

Apparently Professor Townsend survived his encounter with Mac and Alan, and went on to write a tell-all comic book about his experiences.

One Bad Hombre

Saddle up.

The Tree of Crime Bears Bitter Fruit

As the need for new sources of energy becomes ever more painfully obvious, enormous quantities of money are being invested in the development of bio-diesel fuels. While the sustainability of these fuels is questionable, that hasn't stopped scientists from analyzing countless different plants in search of viable sources of bio-diesel. One such member of the vegetable kingdom is the Pong-Pong Tree, known by the scientific name Cerbera Odollam. The Pong-Pong Tree makes its home in India and Southeast Asia, and produces green mango-sized pods. However: fruit fans take caution! The seeds that these pods carry contain a poison, cerberin, that causes a deadly disruption of the heart-beat. The poison seeds have been used for centuries by the inhabitants of India and Madascar for various sinister pursuits. The easy to conceal seeds, combined with the difficulty of detecting cerberin in autopsies, makes the Pong-Pong fruit ideal for murderers everywhere. People have also commonly used it to kill themselves, leading to the ghoulish nickname of "The Suicide Tree."

Would you like to know more?

-Read this article from New Scientist

-Feeling brave? Read this technical proposal on Pong-Pong bio-diesel extraction

How Things Work: Russian Navy Edition

The Novgorod was built in 1874 by the Imperial Russian Navy. Its designer, Admiral Andrei Popov, believed that the unique circular shape of the vessel would give it the capacity to carry much heavier guns that other ships of its size, due to the greater displacement of water. It was also intended to have uncommon stability while fighting coastal battles.

As it happened, the ship was an astounding failure of design. Thanks to its odd shape, manuveribility was difficult and smooth-sailing was impossible, as the Novgorod was tossed about by even mild waves. The force of its own cannons was sufficient to spend the ship spinning in the water, and even the addition of special rudders couldn't fully correct the problem.

The ship proved to be wildly impractical in the Russo-Turkish War of 1877. In the end, the Novgorod was used infrequently as a coast patrol-boat, before finally being scrapped in 1912.

But don't take my word for it!

You can read about it in a book!

Insect America